Beauty in chaos and focused wandering

“Beauty in chaos and focused wandering”… Completed and ready for exhibition next weekend at Gallery Works, Mt Tamborine. Measures 61x91cm, and has a shitload of dots. It is also, I feel, a turning point for me, in the art journey. This one not only comes from my heart, it also highlights my chaotic mind, mostly disorganised, always thinking…
… It has taken me quite some time, I started weeks ago and did bits and pieces where I could fit it in… But since our cat Muss (aka Denise) became terminally ill on Wednesday… I have probably had 3-4 hrs sleep/24hrs… Have not been to bed… Just lie on top and I paint most of the night… Looking after her and spending time with the kids as we all go through this process which has largely made us housebound. So about half of the painting has been done since Wednesday… Could have possibly spent 18hrs each day on it, apart from today which was 9…
… I am bloated, have put on weight, yes in those days… Have swollen hands and feet… And should change my clothes… Find some underclothes… Zoned in AND in caring mode, of course I put myself last. I am lucky I had days off from my full time job. The upcoming exhibition only became confirmed on Thursday… It’s been a roller coaster ride… Which is not over yet. Our Muss is slipping away, but being our little fierce possum hunting warrior that she is, she refuses to give in. She is living on air, a few sips of water, and our love. We privately call the painting “Neesey’s painting”.. It’s because of her it’s finished… It’s what I did to keep me awake and to keep me focused on things beside the unpleasant… This painting has so much of me in it, I actually don’t want to part with it. But I will, and pray it goes to a good home… Like we hope we provided Muss when we got her from a shelter 10yrs ago… The street smart cat who became a part of our family.

Check out www.facebook.com/WensartWen for pictures!

 

Be still for a minute my wandering mind

Why is it that my mind can’t stop turning… Wandering… Thinking.. Wondering… Searching…. Full of ideas… Finding solutions… Solving problems… Or not… .. Seeking answers…. As well as trying to function properly as a working adult/parent? Is this why I am so tired? Even my sleep is full of exploration dreams, not that I recall them all… But they are all over the place in content this I know…

…. Is this my time for “mid life crisis”? ¬†Or is it because I am easily distracted and bored with routine… Yet I crave peace and being settled .. But I can remain focused and patient with a painting.. But impatient that I don’t have enough time to follow my passion… The “real” world always takes precedence… Why does it always have to revolve around the “right” thing to do.. Who makes those rules?

When is it the “right” time to make a change… How do you know the right time… When the dollar dictates? When the kids are settled? When it’s time to retire? I know many will answer this with “you will know when it’s the right time”…. But what if what I feel and what is “right”… Are opposing?